Haven Homes Winter League Report

Surely, life for Tyson Trev cannot get any better? The Forest fan and ungainly golfer is striding top of the table alongside his Geordie henchman following another winning weekend. David Stacey and Kevin O’Loughlin carried the hopes of the league and fought valiantly for 7 holes. The score was three up and just for one moment, the leaders were looking vulnerable. Sources state that O’Loughlin’s fragile concentration span was damaged once the ‘Notts Lump’ embarked on his terrific tales of dogs, ferreting and tarmac laying. Stacey and his flummoxed partner were on the receiving end of anecdotes from the big fella as the hitman quietly put them to the sword in the background. The game was won on the 17th and the title is almost in the bag. For regular updates of latest Arsenal scores, please follow Trev on Facebook.

Peter Holt managed to stretch his game to the 18th yet again. Beloved Maria was slaving away preparing Michelin starred fayre as the 1989 ‘Barman of the Year finalist’ extended his game to the last hole. Dickie Corrin was back in the partnership following his search for a career in the Navy. Brian Hewett and Neil Gray served up the opposition and rescued a point at two down with three to play. Mr ’50 Shades’ was depositing his collection of used Nitro golf balls at numerous locations in the Port Erin village away from the course on the early holes. A stroke of luck on the fourteenth was the turning point and Holty and Corrin couldn’t finish the game off. Corrin’s folly was his inability to push his ball a short distance uphill into the hole 15th.

Other scores from the weekend included a half for Tom Gandy and Jack Gilbert who were up against Paul Thomas and the 2018 Vice Captain, Mark Walton. The dreary game was as colourful as Gandy’s pale, bleached legs. Walton’s mind is now focussed on his performance at the forthcoming ‘Rowany’s Got Talent’ event on Saturday 10th February 2018. (Tickets £5 from the bar.)

Local Commissioner Marc Morley has vowed to make Rowany great again and trumped Coz and Orry Teare 3+1. Some great interplay with Donald O’Hare gave the Slag brothers little hope of escaping the wooden spoon.

A 3 pointer from John Cairney and Steve Gandy is about as rare as Chateau Briand on Holty’s menu these days . The musically gifted Scotsman played a tune that made his partner dance in time for once. Their opponents Dave Corrin and Allan Tasker had no time at all to relax and went down on the 15th.

On a serious note, please consider the plight of aged folk in the community this winter. Many are vulnerable and disorientated due to the harsh conditions at this time of year. Losing 5+4 to Billy Newton and Orry Glover is a sad reality of winter golf. If you have any spare bob hats, thermals or pocket warmers, please donate to Addy and Wilf Lowey. There can be no other possible reason than hypothermia for such a dreadful defeat to that pair on the Port Erin links.



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